October- "Let me check"

"Let me check to see if I heard it right," said Zach heavily. He dropped the thin wrist that he'd been holding...that seemed solid enough...and gingerly prodded the bed, which seemed reasonbly (and expectably) solid too. "You found an unconscious girl in front of your door, you carried her inside, put her on the bed, she fell THROUGH the bed, and you had to move the bed and everything around it to get to her after she had fallen THROUGH the bed?"

"Are you drunk?" demanded Mike, trying to peer into Nick's face, but Nick wouldn't let him.

"I am NOT drunk, nor have I been drinkin!" declared Nick.

"Here's a question then," Mike crossed his arms. "How come she is lying on the bed right now, just like a regular human being? Zach--what are you doing?" He added, because Zach as feeling his forehead.

"Double-checking," muttered Zach, who had the other hand on the girl's forehead.

"Right, anyway," continued Mike. He eyed the girl suspiciously, "She IS human, isn't she?"

"I don't KNOW!" wailed Nick, "she looks like one!?"

"Ah," Zach stopped on checking whether the girl had swollen nymph nodes and looked up. "That's the problem. See, if you had an apple that looked and tasted like an apple, then it's okay. If you had an apple that neither looked nor tasted like an apple, then that's sort of okay too. But when you have an apple that looks like an apple but tastes like something else, then there's a problem. Never mind," he mumbled in response to the expressions he was receiving.

"That makes sense," remarked Mike. "Sort of."

"Er," said Nick.

"Three percent?" inquired Zach, meaning how much sense he was making.

"I'd give it five," said Mike.

"Thanks," Zach sighed and looked at his two friends. "Alright, ASSUMING that she is human and ASSUMING that her body is behaving like human bodies do--"

"You don't have to use 'assuming' so many times," said Nick.

"But we're making a lot of assumptions," protested Zach.

"Cut it out," said Mike.

"Fine," said Zach. "IF her body is human--"

Mike groaned.

"Then she is unconscious and has a fever," continued Zach, ignoring Mike. "And IF her body respondes to med the way humans do..."

"No hospitals," said Nick.

"Right," said Zach, who looked pale and worried. He fished out his keys and tossed it to Mike. "You know where my room is, right?"

"Of course not," retorted Mike sarcastically, "I've only been there a few hundred times."

"Great," said Zach, "Second desk drawer, there's a tin-box. You can double check if you want, but it should be a med-kit...mother forced me to bring one...." He explained. "We're helping, aren't we?" he added.

" 'Course," said Mike, and was out the door, closing it carefully behind him.

"Oookay," said Zach, sighing for the third time in the past five minutes. He looked at the girl, then at Nick. "Don't suppose you have an ice-pack?"
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I spilt the water that I was drinking on myself when I saw yesterday's comment.
I wonder if writers generally suffer from attacks of conscience?
Joking...joking.
I KNOW some do.